I find myself preoccupied with this question. Jesus said not to worry about what you will eat or drink or what you will wear. So instead I think of things like water, bugs, potty spots, hair washing, medicine and cameras.
What will I need in the villages? I need a little lock box thingy that wraps to a tree so I don't have to worry about theft. In a world where there is so much scarcity, someone like me bringing essentials would be a prime target for pilfering.
I saw a spice box set on uncommongoods.com and I could make one of those for fun. it is not something i feel I need, but i could give it as a gift to mom, or rose, or something. probably for less than the $35 since i have some spices already.
but I need my medicine. I would like to get off medicine so I would be free to just be myself. that's not likely to happen and I wouldn't have a way to monitor blood pressure. without hormone meds, I am the devil, so best not chance it unless God requires it. Medicine has been a great blessing! but it does cause us to look to science rather than God and to bless science rather than God.
my hair.
i have purchased several cheap scarves at Old Navy. I suppose this actually falls under worrying about what you wear. But my hair gets oily in one day (although it is great for having less wrinkles!) and YUK!! I need to wash it AND condition it, particularly because I color it.
If I spent a whole year in Kenya, I would just shave my head and let it grow out slowly. This horrified Steve. I think I have a mandate from my husband to keep my hair if at all possible. but I would be wearing a wrap on my head! not walking around bald. I don't think I have a good head for bald.
Water. OH WATER. WATER WATER WATER WATER. Water is important. and I cannot drink the water there. (neither can they!) I will have some prayer warriors standing in the gap for me before the Lord.
which leads me to remember potty issues. Toilet paper. it is scarce. Titus was so shocked when he came to the U.S. and he saw that someone had papered a house. He could not believe the waste of something so valuable!!! I second that now.
so I am thinking I would like to arrange having a toilet seat placed on top of a bucket that has had the bottom cut out. then we could set that over the outhouse hole in the ground and I could sit down (at least in the mornings!)
and if I happen to get sick in those 8 weeks, I will need to sit because nausea, vomiting and diarrhea make me dizzy and faintish. I could never hold myself up. I end up laying on bathroom floors at home if I am ever hit with such a virus.
chin hairs. I don't usually worry about those stupid chin hairs that begin after 30. but what do you do out in a village for weeks? grow little sparse beards about one's chin? HILARIOUS! and leg hair? ugh. I shall be a circus attraction in no time, if God so chooses. However, if I can come up with suitable alternatives, I will avoid such catastrophe.
I am looking forward to working the plants, sorting the beans, washing laundry with the women, and learning names, words, and the language. I want true fellowship in the spirit.
moods. I dread my pouty moods, whiney moods, angry moods. Should be good discipline for me. I seek it! I want the Kingdom of God to begin with me. I want to live in Christ! I want to throw down the god of the stomach and appetite and comfort. I am too much a follower of the god of comfort. Time for idols to fall and Jesus to be lifted up!
"If indeed we share in the sufferings of Christ..." well.....Stephanie doesn't suffer much here in the U.S. I don't have the sufferings of Christ. I am not persecuted, I am not hungry, i have a NICE place to lay my head. I do not battle the pharisees, I do not bear many burdens of others. Mostly it is a really nice life where I get to do whatever I want to do, I can pay for most anything I need, I get to worship in freedom, I talk about Jesus freely everywhere with little pushback (strange looks though!), I don't have crowds interfering in my life, I don't have to walk everywhere. Very few people question my motives or my direction or my integrity.
I want to follow Jesus.
I DO follow Jesus.
It seems He's led me into the promised land!!!
It seems that He fights my battles and is the lifter of my head!
It seems that He always promotes me.
so I can afford to let this all go and love others, serve others, bless others, forgive others, submit to others. The love of Jesus compells me!
but I do worry about water, medicine, bathroom facilities, my hair, and yes, "what you will eat." I try not to worry. I try to trust. I want to love. I want to go reaching out in love. It is not a sacrifice, it is a joy. I'll probably hate it, though. My flesh is going to scream. My spirit takes a perverse delight in considering how my flesh will suffer. I am an overcomer! I am a victor in Christ! This life is not my own. I pray I can do this well. I think of the Christy Nockel's song--"My light will shine on earth and my Father WILL BE praised!" Normally, I am not into light shining because it smacks of the boasting we are not to do---but let my light shine in this.
Huge diversion here.......which makes me think of Laura Koke of Shoreline church. She shines dimly due to her fashion focus but since her son died last year, her light has been like a stadium and I praise the Lord she serves for how He has upheld her and proven her to be a true child of God in spite of all the criticism. Bless her, Lord. She has suffered. She has loved you. She trusts in You. Let her light shine. You are praised, Lord!
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