era not error

ha ha

I was reading my own post from the other day.

I wrote "In an error of PC and AA"

and I meant, "In an era of politically correct speech requirements and in consideration of all the people who are recovering alcoholics"

when discussing the lady at the M's party who insisted I try some wine.

(yes, when I write little stubby sentences, even in error, there are many more complex thoughts behind it that I've neglected to expand suitably. That, my friend, is a sign of a poor writer. Alas! Woe is me.)

or maybe NOT woe

Sir Dark Fin

K has become Sir Dark Fin.

turns out M has a fish named Sir Dark Fin.

K wore his Dad's new Christmas armor to become such as the fish (only kinda bigger and stronger and breathing air while standing on two feet and without fins---you know, JUST ALIKE)

Really, though, this is Mr's present which he really wanted. We weren't getting each other gifts, but he looked this up on the internet for the 27th time and found it was on SALE---which of course meant that he requested me to purchase it for him.

It was a bit tight on Mr but looked good. He was amazed at the weight of it. K came over and wanted to try it on. Now we will have to have a costume party! I have wanted to have a New Years costume party---doesn't that sound fun!
There is no way I can do it this year since I will be driving north.

I'm finishing my paper right now. Taking a break (so what else is new?). I only have to finish all the citation, but I LOATHE that part and I made it particularly difficult on myself by just sort of randomly discussing things without considering where I got them---now I must comb through stuff and figure that out.
Also, I looked up a lot of government info online, like the WIC program (supplemental food for low-income women, infants and children) and Medicaid. I copied some charts from another paper and I think I should cite them although I was just sort of copying their idea and writing in my own stuff, but you aren't supposed to use others' ideas without giving them credit. X told me that in China, you don't have to cite anything, you can just write it. That's great for writing papers, but then again, I suppose that is why Americans worry about their intellectual information. (we are so proprietal---is that even a word?)

Had fun playing scattergoris. Did I mention that already? Because I had to look up lists of trees, sports teams, and I've tried to pay attention to names of celebrities (which I usually ignore. I know Brad, Angelina, Tom, Nicole, Brittany, I can't even think of the guy from Saturday Night ...wait! I can't even think of the name of that 70s disco movie! Horrors!)

I like book titles.....Clan of Cave Bear, Dune, Emma, Three Muskateers, Count of Monte Cristo, Hamlet, Sense and Sensibility, Eleanor of Aquitaine, Desiring God, Holy Bible, Systematic Theology, Tale of Two Cities, Wuthering Heights,

I also went to the baby food aisle and looked at the product name. Go try this sometime. Things have sure changed! I was shocked! There are quite a few additions to the old pear, green beans, applesauce regimens.

Back to work. Oh bother.

barely blogging

I am not sure what I want to say on here, only that I know I haven't been writing. There is so much to do at home. It seems odd to think I actually STARTED this when I was here. It was maybe this time last year, because I remember the new years pics of "first night" downtown---what a great event and one I will have to miss.

what have I learned?
a ton.

--don't leave homework unfinished. (that paper is haunting me....I must begin work on it)
---hubby does not talk. didn't I know this already? he's an introvert. he's trying.
--I THOUGHT I was busy up there, but I was not. THIS is busy.
---my children really DO take up so much time, but I enjoy it.
--the reason I cannot get more done up there is that there is not the variety of experiences throughout the day. the effort to complete schoolwork just drones on and on whereas here there are a multitude of directions to take each day and it is easier to cycle through one and then another.
--I have to start watching TV, terrible but true. I'll need a way to change directions and control my thoughts---escapism might work.
--my eyes need the new prescription glasses because I lose my visual acuity throughout the day when taxed.
---I seem to avoid exercising although I love to be active.
--It is good to see friends and it is very hard work. I've seen them all except CH, whom I hope to see next week, but I've got to email her. Everyone else contacted me except JP, who came home from Seattle and so I went over to greet her the next day.
---I do not like wine. Wine was at the parties everywhere this year and so I just went without. At a party last night, one woman I did not know insisted that I try this certain one (I've forgotten the name). She swears it does not cause a headache and that she can drink two bottles without feeling the effects.(oh my)..that it is not dry and does not suck up all the moisture out of your body. I explained that I usually held a glass of wine when I was with insistent Italian Catholics who were unable to understand why I might not want to drink wine and with people like her. (I thought that might dissuade her from the pressure tactics, but alas, it did not). I tried the wine, it tasted fine --rather like juice---and put it back down and smiled. She relented but thought somehow that she had convinced me and had done a great thing. That was a bit humorous. I would think in an error of PC and with all the AA members walking around that people would allow others to go without, but as for ages, people cannot stand when you do not participate in whatever it is that THEY might be doing.
--I'm not as philosophical as I'd like to be, but I am rather lazy and whiney.
---I'm always tired. I worry about my health. I am very moody. I'm very demanding. I like to be waited on---like crazy! I get that from my mom, for sure. My children will undoubtedly follow in these horrible footsteps.
--I love my children's new dates. G for L and M for K. Not too pleased with S's, but I see E around her as a friend and I'm always hopeful for him. He has a good family, good grades, football star, good-looking and well-mannered. I'm always on the lookout for the family's future gene pool (good thing my children do not read my blog).
---I am exonerated socially. I recently read an article in Newsweek that blogs were not just for public consumption but also good for the writers if no one reads them but the author. Hooray! and my readers are exonerated because they no longer must slavishly conform to my wish to share. :-)

I read my 2nd neice's blog---my dad has read it with some concern--it is so speedy! I mean she zooms through thoughts. I find it interesting psychologically. Hers is the most elaborate blog I've ever seen. She spends significant amounts of time explaining her life and she's very excited and happy and speedy and extroverted. Makes me look like a slug. And so much current lingo. I'd like to really spend some time going through it. She's about to have a baby.

My other 2nd neice, on hubby's side, former daughter, just turned 16. I'm wondering if she has gotten the car that supposedly she is going to get. But I rarely get the news on that. I was so thankful to get a beautiful Christmas card send to my daughters with a picture of the two 2nd neices! Gorgeous!
When I get back up north, I'll scan it and put it on kodakgallery.

which reminds me to put the only pictures I have, from my L, onto kodakgallery to send out. At least there are a few!!! I need to get a new battery charger for my camera battery, which is dead.

Merry Christmas. Perhaps I'll find the time to truly focus on the Lord and the meaning of the coming of the Christ child---but I'm thankful because I gain strength to continue through His Life.

Grades

I got my grades back. I made a B+ in my proseminar and a B- in my stats. Can you believe it? B- is actually a great grade. I'm stunned.

I really could have done better in these classes. I'm working on strategies now that I know what I am up against. I'm going to finish that paper and get my B in whatever range he chooses. And then I shall begin agagin!

howdy

Feeling better.
had a fever on Monday (wondered why I was so sluggish, blamed my lazy self but was exonerated)
had an intense headache on Tuesday but was waning by 7pm and gone by 8pm when we were at Handels Messiah by the Austin Symphony Orchestra at The Riverbend Center.

Did not wake up today until 10am! now that is a bit freaky, but I DO feel better. Here I am three hours later blogging, but not accomplishing much.
well, I paid my northern electric bill, paid my credit card bill, checked on my texas bills, filled out the Baylor college application for the youngest---just to see if she'll get accepted. She could live with her sister (sis won't like it though).

Number one son is doing well with his new friend M. They spent the day together. They came over here, Son looked stunning in his new suit and very relaxed and happy. She looked beautiful, of course. He met her parents and the mom talked about grandbabies! (Even we don't do that!) But son went right along very amicably and impressed the girl by talking with the mother so long and so well and really paying attention. Sounds like they did the typical quizzing that we do---what do you want to do? Tell us about your family. Etc. K is very very happy and hopes this lasts for a very long time.

Here is an interesting story for you.

When I was here last (the time I got the girls a manicure), I was at the local Chinese Buffet with Hubby, Mom, and youngest. There I saw M's mom. I said, "HEY!" and we talked about 20 minutes. I told her to put in a good word for my son because I really liked her daughter and K thought she was pretty and since they are a good family, I think it would be a good match.

Well, that might have seemed a little forward, but I know that parents actually have a lot of influence with their children---so you never know.

Turns out M was no longer with her previous boyfriend. On our trip back from the North, we stopped to see our daughter and eat with her. K wanted to come. We told him to turn back because he had left too late and we would soon be on our way. M goes to school rather near where our daughter does, so he stopped and called her and she said, "Come over!" and he did.
He returned the next day.
(they stayed up all night talking happily within a group)

Evidently, the mother HAD encouraged the daughter and now my K had called. Turned out they have much in common and had a great time. They thought K was OLD like 28, but he is only 22. K thought M was older than him, but she is only 19. Age-wise, that is a good match, about three years apart---22 and 19.

K has his job at the big company lined up. He HAS to look like a great prospect. She is a very talkative intelligent pretty Christian, just what we say he precisely needs. He talks more than his Dad, so that should be okay. He's just got to remember that he MUST be sure to talk throughout his lifetime. At NO time is it okay not to talk in a relationship, particularly with a talkative girl. I find this to be a tremendous problem with Mr that just wears me out sometimes. He thinks Hmphf works as an answer. Or similarly, "Oh" or "Hmmmn."

But big talkers don't go too well with other big talkers, I mean, SOMEONE needs to listen.....so I suppose you must manage with a low-level talker and find some girlfriends to keep things lively!
Mr talks very well when we go out to eat, yes it does strain the budget, but when he does anything else, he tends to zone out. So we go out to eat alone frequently----not easy, though, when I am far away, but he does pretty good on the phone most of the time.

L is sad to be up at school working while her friends have gone home. She wants to quit. i'm taking mom to visit her tomorrow. Maybe we'll do it more often.

Merry Christmas! May God be praised!

Home again home again jiggity jig

Okay, so I wasn't at the market to buy a fat pig.

Instead, I was at CVS, able to pick up my prescriptions---something that had me worried about the back and forth nature of my existence.

OK again.
so I want to see all my friends.
I am too tired to try.
But I want to see all my friends.
but I wish I could see them in party groups, more at a time. less time consuming.

I want to have a dinner party for some couple friends from our other church.
it would be so nice to have a dinner party like with CH, BM (he he), CG, and TL. But TL has not really been available. So then CH, BM, and CG.

But I am planning to try JP, DG, and AH. Mr P was not available last year and we hope to try again.

I'm thinking of the Arkansas Conundrum.
I'm thinking success and fame to you bud!

I'm missing out-of-town friends, CT, AN, AL.
My Chinese friends, JXF, XL, J-----oh my goodness, I forgot that last name! (I'll remember it when I work on christmas cards)

and friends from school! L, R, A, and professors (last name) C, H, M and S.

and I miss my best neighbors who have moved out! C and S! Pastors! Gone on to further ministries.

I'm reading the Three Muskateers.
I shouldn't.
I should have read the books that Debbie suggested.....but Mr suggested it as he just finished it recently (well, recently he finished Ivanhoe) and I know I have 1,000 things to do---but they are piling up and overwhelming me....so I am running away to France (by reading).

I have to send in my defensive driving, my driving record (which shows I got no tickets at all and then one in 2003, 2004, 2005, and now 2006!---thankful to Jesus that it is not more than once a year! but dang, I better slow down because that is so expensive!), my proof of insurance to a place in Texas so they'll let me off the rest of the hook(I've already paid a pretty sum and then the defensive driving course costs a little bundle and the speedy postage did too!).
So I guess my Christmas present was the costly speeding I did on the way to help my mom move out of her house and come down here. Oh well, good cause.

Have to tell my youngest that she cannot go to the coast for spring break. Evidently, she's even been in on the planning session with the other girls and their MOTHERS. Ran into one mother on a walk today and she questioned me about it, I said, "NO WAY! I am not and was never and will not allow her to go!" I realize she will be so upset and I hate that, but I love her enough to say no. (she's going to make me pay dearly, I am sure).
and she wants to get a hotel room overnight with her friends for prom 9how dumb do they think I am? and who are the weird parents that allow this?---NOT ME).
No, she will have to come home at 2am like her sister.
It is midnight for the 11th grade and 2am for the 12th grade---so be it.

but I am planning on bringing her to the North for spring break along with her brother, sister and father. Maybe a friend, maybe L's boyfriend. We'll see. I'll be a maniac in finals, but Mr can tote them around. DT (or BD) will be acting in a play, so we can go see that!

Tallyho, I"m off.
:-)

Blog updated

adorable cookies S made when I was here before at Thanksgiving. Aren't they adorable?Her friend K made the Jesus bear. She knew I'd love it and she was right.

Does anything look different? The dashboard to my blog is slightly changed. I had to create a google account, but I'm not sure what it got me!

I'm home. It is odd. Several things just aren't what I'd like them to be......I come home and my things are all moved. Mr took over my dresser drawer and medicine cabinet and parking space. I have no personal room in the house (but decided that I'd count the rooms I've given my mother as my own).

This is going to be difficult.

My youngest says (when I won't give her money because I gave her some the day before and she hasn't done anything to earn any)...."When you were gone I was happy."

Not a very good thing to say.....not that it is not legitimate to think, but to imply that I make her miserable and when I wasn't here ---she was always happy----well, we all know better, don't we?

But it is good for me to see it, because I think some of the same rotten stuff myself.....and it is not right. I come home and I feel like my stuff is in the way when Mr puts it all in the closet....but I remember thinking when he was coming, "Oh, he's going to make a mess everywhere!" and I had to stop myself because HEY! I WANT him to make a mess, I want him to be around. But I've got to remember those thoughts exist. So making them explicit is in bad taste, but they are hanging there in the mind, so it is not the end of the world if they come out.

and somehow, I thought he talked more. When he's on the phone, he talks enough. So maybe I should go outside and call in...(he he).

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. Robert Anderson

We are going out tonight and I hope it goes well. I am sad because just the weight of things makes me moody---not that anything is really bad. I'm telling myself---"See? You are just a moody complainer, so go back to school and try again." OK, I will.

He says I do use bigger words. I love the vocab of my friends up there. Sure there are GRE words floating around when there is a presentation (and I actually know the definition of one or two), but we actually use long words when chatting. I still am enamoured with how fast they talk, so that when a conversation is really going, you stay so alert because you might not catch it all. Very stimulating.

Took my mom to the Armadillo Bazaar in Austin. Each year I enjoy going and THIS YEAR I FINALLY BOUGHT SOME ART! I only bought a print, but I love the work of Chris Long, Jay Long and Deborah Dupont. I bought a Chris Long print for $100. No, I cannot afford it, but I can't afford not to. Deborah's work evolved to a point where I am not as fond of it, so I want to get the ones I really like while they are available. I thought that one of Jay's works, called "Literature" was gone. I passed it up last year and then this year it was not on the website. But after I bought one from Chris Long (more in a minute), I saw that Jay Long DID have the literature one. Well, I can't afford to buy another one, so I may contact him to make sure it is available later. Maybe in the Spring. It would go well in my bedroom in Texas, it is very muted. Even in my family room where I currently have a historical texas map and S's v-ball tournament medals in a shadow box (and several hanging off the corners of the box).

The one I bought is a brightly colored Austin, Live Music Capital of the World with the capital building in the background, 6th street and musicians in the foreground with news text visible through the colors. He also showed me where the congressional bill that named Austin in 1991 is there, as well as the alternative arts paper, The Austin Chronicle and some of the Statesmen headlines like, "Rumsfield Walks Out" and more. It will be a wonderful reminder when I live through the february winds on my daily jaunts. WAIT! Good news. I only have class two days a week next semester! That means more time home (if I can afford flights) or else tons of solitary (ouch). All in all, I think it will be great. And I'll be able to get more done by not having to spend time gearing up to walk up there each day.

I decorated the tree! It's almost done. I ran out of hooks. Mr and I put it together last night. The youngest is so not a worker, so we weren't going to hassle her to try and make some memories. He got the lights on, so I put the rest up. We've got ribbon for garland and then crosses and Texas Stars. Next is silver and gold frosted large globes (balls) and lastly is the adorable felt characters I bought at the London Tower on our trip to England. (man, that was too cool!). I haven't gotten them up. I need to get more hooks.

Then we searched and searched for my address book so I could prepare cards. Bought the cards. Bought the stamps. Bought a nice gold pen. Figure I'll use the picture of all of us from Thanksgiving to send everywhere---need to get those from Kodak Gallery. I was afraid I was only going to send them as I received them---and you never know. Someone might not do it this year, then I couldn't send them one, then they think they are off my list--OUCH! It is so hard when you pare the list down. I suppose it is a fact of life.

I knew this one friend (not a dear, close friend---more like someone I knew--or a friend of a friend) and she sent out maybe 250 or more Christmas Cards. That seemed excessive to me, but it must have been a joy to her. I don't think I've ever even met that many people. And while I think I may have nearly liked that many---I can't get that many to like me, so I save on stamps.

:-)

Seriously, though, it IS hard to stay in touch with people you like! It is so hard to get together with people you do not naturally come across! So I hate when classes end, we change churches, we move, people move away, etc. But it is the ebb and flow of life. We are such a mobile society.

I worry I'll lose all my friends in the next five years due to busyness. (sniff sniff)

GEESHK, am I being too morose here?

I didn't think I was in a bad mood, really, but when I look at what I am writing....hmph.

I think I'll lay down and take a bit of a little nappy (a nap) so I can liven up a bit!

This is Christmas and I worship the Lord, I am thankful that Emmanuel, God With Us, has come to unite us with Him forever.

Rejoice!

Contentment

Okay, much happier. I'm at home.

The drive was long...about 10 hours the first day and then 9 hours the next day, but we stopped to look at my mom's house, our old church, the restaurant where Mr worked for something like 7 years. We stopped to see our middle child for dinner---she took a thirty minute break to come eat with some tex-mex with us--yum.
Our first born was trying to drive up to meet us, but he didn't get out of town in time. So we told him to turn back around because we were soon to leave the restaurant. He ended up stopping midway and visited a girl from our old church who goes to a college about an hour from home. They had dinner and a movie. I haven't talked to him yet, but he probably thought that was more fun than seeing his ole mum.
But I came home and watched "Iron Chefs" with my youngest and some plastic surgery show after unpacking. Took a walk. Went to bed. I'm still not ready for the day and it is 11 am. Nice slow pace. I've got a lot to do and if I were really up on things, I would sure love to meet my friends for lunch and prayer, but I am too lazy to call at this point.

I still haven't finished the quarter (we don't have semesters up there, we have quarters, only 10 rushed weeks to finish an incredible amount of work) because I turned in a final paper unfinished. I never would have thought I'd do such a thing, but there you go---I did!

I really really tried to quit my last week and Mr would hear none of it. I accused him of callousness and so he relented. But now that I am out, yep, I am okay with going back. I really think that the next semester will be more fun. My classes will be Field Methods, Social Bio something and Child Development.

Field Methods is where we go somewhere----this particular professor has an education focus, so say a 1st grade class, a community college, high school class, or it could be a bar (I wouldn't do a bar, but some classmates wanted to), a church (more my style), or a playground. You have to observe everything for two hours as a participant observer meaning you are engaged with the other people doing the same things or something (so how could you do that in a 1st grade class??) and then you write copious notes on and on for about four hours a week. Then you write an official report. All of that should be fun and interesting. I observed my friends children one day, four of them and it DID take hours and hours to write up the notes! I video taped them, which helped. But it was a final project that took a few weeks, not just something I did every week for 10 weeks, but that is how graduate school is.

I really thought that the classes would only be about twice as hard. And while I cannot give a sort of measure, sometimes they are about that and sometimes it is worse! Then every now and then there is some light week. But I don't think I ever actually completed every single thing I was supposed to do in a week EVER. In the 10 weeks, I was always short----whereas normally, I am ahead. I learned a lot about myself---all bad stuff.

I suppose the hardship builds character. We'll see! I think I have humiliated myself. I whined nearly the whole time.
but supposedly, all the other graduate students have a similar story. They all cried in their first semester.
I don't think my cohort all cried. M might have cried, I don't think L cried and I don't think D cried. I can't see C crying, she was always composed. and the guy was always fairly even keel. He doesn't likely cry ever. (can't be sure about that sort of thing, but I know my guy just never cries! quite unlike me....)

I only officially cried maybe three or four times. Two big ones and then some snivelling at the end. Now I can laugh about it. I'm so dramatic.

I think I'll take a nap. AFTER I call the people about my speeding ticket in August when I went to help move my mom. I was supposed to complete the drivers education course before December fourth and well, today is the 7th.
I'll go call them now.
Blessings! It is warming up to be a Merry Christmas! I love the warmth here and I enjoyed the cold there. It was so complex and new!

22 degrees Feels like 11

Today has a high of 32 and a low of 13. If it is 22 and feels like 11, what does it feel like at 13? The sun is out so maybe it won't be too bad, but I am so sure the glare will be horrendous. I have my ski goggles and they are polarized, so I may wear them on the way to the airport, won't that look ridiculous!?!

I seriously cannot sleep. I was awake every single hour, although MAYBE I slept through the 3am hour---so I am pretending that at a minimum, I DID sleep from 3 am to 4am. But it was awful. I cannot get comfortable. I cannot breathe. My dreams are scary. My legs are very very restless.

I thought I went to bed calm. It shouldn't have been so bad! I don't know what to do for it. I read an article by a professor here as I went to sleep. It was a good one, so it was enjoyable reading. I was pleased that Mr would be coming today. I guess it is the paper and two exams still just making me crazy. I am very afraid of the stats exam. It is 15 questions and I can't discern which method I should use for each one, although I am supposed to know.

We get a word problem and some of the clues. Those tell you which method to use. But I'm not clear on the various formulas. Often, even when I have it right, I will think it is wrong because the number looks weird. Too high or too low. But in class we have some examples that end up that way, so I try to trust myself. Anyway, I must be diligent to do it and then just trust that everything will turn out as it should. I definitely have serious problems concentrating and applying myself to my work. I'm sure if I could sleep well, I would have fewer difficulties.

It is 9 am and Mr flies in about noon. He will likely be in line on the ground. I was waiting on the ground on my return flight here. It took maybe 15 minutes to get to the gate. Maybe more. It is so hard to wait when you are already on the ground.

A news report said something like 2500 flights were canceled on Thursday/Friday and some huge proportion of them were in or out of my airport. The snow was so beautiful and I would have enjoyed it immensely, except that I had just learned that Mr's flight was delayed AGAIN and so I trudged through the snow to school.

It was fun. My boots ARE waterproof. The snow was slush in many places. My coat is more than adaquate. There were high winds blowing and I still had to unzip my coat because I got so hot. I didn' t need my face mask or goggles or even gloves! Boots and coat were enough. I didn't see any snowmen. I hope there are some snowmen out there! I had my hood covering most of my face and I kept my head down staring at the ground 5 feet in front of me. When I stopped to look straight ahead, the trees were so beautiful, reminding me of that tree in Lord of the Rings---all white. The campus was gorgeous. The pond and lake looked so nice (view from a third floor window), I read that the lake was 47 degrees? maybe 57---and so it was keeping my area from the worst of the cold. (poor little duckies, though)

Oh, I need to lay down AGAIN! and I am having a piercing pain in my head. GOSH I cannot wait until MR is here! I sure do like that fella.